January 4, 1945 Thursday

Dear Harriet,

This will probably be written in pieces and another one of those jumpsy letters but I’ll start.  Thanks a great deal for sending those clippings and play program.  I would have sent them back sooner but I wanted to read them again.  The play and play program touched something inside me-especially the part under the heading of “staff.” The clippings were quite exceptional and I enjoyed them.

                Yes, Chris is at Weber. Maybe you have it all straight by now-if not, about the only thing I can say is that Chris wasn’t much satisfied with the U and it was costing too much.  Besides, he could get the business courses he wanted at Weber so he’s putting in time there.

                Between you and I-I’m a thinking Chris wishes he were here-especially since Jim and I have been able to get back together for a few hours.  It would make things a lot more complete if he were here. He’s told me he’d like that.

                This military life isn’t as exciting or romantic as a person may think but all in all Jim and I both have and are receiving training that can not be bought for any amount anywhere else.  Cause as I said before, the Government has spent millions of dollars for the equipment we use.  Chris probably could have made a school somewhere of some kind and got a hold of some good training.

                A while ago I got your letter of the 25^th telling of your Christmas.  It was surely written so I could understand and feel and even picture your Christmas.  I’m sure you family enjoyed your presence that your Christmas was to your liking.

                Course it’s long past by the time you read this but it’s still history and in letters I guess that’s what we’ll have to consider and put up with.  We’re both getting old enough that there probably won’t be many more Christmases spent home.  Kids have a habit of getting big and having children of their own-spending Christmas in their own home and with their own family and just visiting with their parents.

                It’s well too that you were able to see Fils-those times are fewer now that you’re a school girl again.

                It makes me feel good to know that you think of me some and miss me a bit as you mentioned.  Like most of the lads here, no matter how much they hear it, they still hunger for the next time.  It’s been so long since I’ve been with you that truthfully I don’t miss you any more.  I don’t know how to explain it. “Missing” has turned into more of a thinking, a constant wishing I could see you.  Maybe it amounts to the same thing as missing you.  Sometimes at night when it’s dark and silent, I drift so far away in my thoughts and longing for you that I’d like to squeeze water out of my pillow.  Just as anger can become “riled up” in a person so can the opposite feeling.  And boy sometimes I get so “riled up” that my heart beats like I’ve been running.

                It was certainly grand of you to visit my people when you were home.  My folks mentioned it a couple of times and I know they like to have you.

                Harriet when you write Lila, I’d sure like it if you’d give her the word for me-I hope she fares well and all. You’ll tell me how everything goes. Gosh since I evacuated tings have happened.  I won’t know the place anymore.

                Oh yes you mentioned what you call a boner-about sending my folks the Christmas card.  You should tell me about it-just how many times have I done that.  More than one my dear. Well let’s call it a night.  I really ought to write my grandparents- I don’t get to only every month or so.

                Hoping you find school easy and enjoyable.  Maybe it was kind of hard to get in the Harness again.  For you too-now, as the clipping says-for you now and forever may the day break and the shadows flee away. Pablo